Pity Party Much??

Daily OM

January 12, 2009 Releasing Negativity Pity Party We all have days when the bad things seem to outweigh the good ones and we begin to think that life isn’t fair. You get stuck in traffic, which makes you late for an important meeting, and then your car gets towed. You might ask yourself, “Why me?” Events like this one can test anyone’s ability to be grateful and feel optimistic. If you have a tendency to feel sorry for yourself, and many of us do, things usually progress to the next stage: the pity party. You begin to feel like the innocent victim of a dismal fate because you are seeing your life through inaccurate lenses. Most of the thoughts that run through your mind at times like these are not helpful, and they mainly serve to increase your indignation and feelings of powerlessness. What these feelings and thoughts don’t do is change your circumstances or make you feel better. When you have a terrible day, there should definitely be a time and place to have your feelings so you can process them. It’s important not to pretend that you are fine with things when you aren’t. It’s also important, however, to notice when you’re having a pity party. It’s a good idea to set a time limit in which to fully express your emotions and not feel guilty, ashamed, or judge yourself. Having a friend witness you during this process can be helpful. You may also want to write about your feelings. When your time is up, let go of the negativity you just expressed. You can declare your intention to your friend. If you’ve written down your feelings, you can burn the piece of paper or throw it in the recycling bin. Try not to dwell on unpleasant experiences and do everything you can to avoid holding on to negative emotions. When you indulge in self-pity, you only make a bad day worse. Stop feeling sorry for yourself, release the notion that you are a victim, and notice the good that exists in your life.

We are what our thoughts have made us...

Eknath Easwaran’s Thought for the Day

January 9

We are what our thoughts have made us; so take care about what you think. Words are secondary. Thoughts live; they travel far.
– Swami Vivekananda

The ancestor of every destructive action, every destructive decision, is a negative thought. We do not have to be afraid of negative thoughts as long as we do not welcome them. They are in the air, and they may knock at anyone’s door; but if we do not embrace them, ask them in, and make them our own, they can have no power over us.

We can think of thoughts as hitchhikers. At the entrance to the freeway, we used to see a lot of hitchhikers carrying signs: “Vancouver,” “Mexico,” “L.A.” One said in simple desperation, “Anywhere!” Thoughts are a lot like those hitchhikers. We can pick them up or pass them by. Negative thoughts carry signs, but usually we see only one side, the side with all the promises. The back of the sign tells us their true destination: sickness and sorrow.

Nobody is obliged to pick up these passengers. If we do not stop and let them in, they cannot go anywhere, because they are not real until we support them. There is sympathy in the world: pick it up. There is antipathy in the world: don’t pick it up. Hatred destroys. Love heals.

Thought of the day that reminded me of where I am...

I live completely in the present, released from the prison of the past with its haunting memories and vain regrets, released from the prison of the future with its tantalizing hopes and tormenting fears. All the enormous capacities formerly trapped in past and future flow to me here and now, concentrated in the hollow of my palm. No longer driven by desire for personal pleasure or profit, I am free to use all these capacities to alleviate the suffering of those around me. In living for others, I come to life.

From Eknath Easwaran’s Thought for the Day

Dear Diary...

Well, I suppose a blog is a bit like a diary, right? A public diary maybe.

Hmm, how funny it is that I've always started my diaries with the best intentions, and after awhile, let them fade and all too often disappear.

I have spent the last few years making a big impact on fitness forums and websites, but something has been pushing me to focus on myself.

I have gotten lost, once again, in efforts to put others before myself and subsequently faded BACK to that place. We all know the one, the one where we do NOT want to be.

This is my step forward to a different place, one that will allow me to continue my life's journey hopefully helping others along the way... it's just what I do.


Namasté,


AV